Generally speaking, I don't really like to be touched. It's a matter of common knowledge amongst my friends that I don't like strangers bumping into me or crowded bars that cause people to lean on me or knock me around. I like a good 2 feet of personal space or I start to get extremely annoyed and agitated.
What I usually don't admit is that I'm not really comfortable with people I know touching me until I'm VERY comfortable with them as a person. Hugs, kisses on the cheek, the casual pat on the arm cause a weird sense of anxiety and awkwardness for me. Don't get me wrong, I hug my friends and family all the time, but when I first meet someone, I do all I can to avoid personal contact without offending the other person. I don't know why I'm this way, but I think it has something to do with the fact that my mom was never a big hugger and my dad and his brothers were notorious ticklers...you know the type, the ones that hold you down and tickle you until you scream or piss yourself (I did the former, not the latter). Now, I think of tickling as a small type of assault and the quickest way to extremely piss me off. No one I know likes to be tickled and most ticklers will NEVER stop when you ask them to.
ANYway, despite my aversion to touch, I do miss it as a single woman. I miss a man's palm moving up and down my spine just before drifting off to sleep. I miss knotting fingers together as we stroll down the street. I miss the slight graze of fingertips across my forehead as he sweeps an errant lock of hair out of my eyes. I miss the feel of a palm resting at the nape of my neck as we wait in line at the movie theater and that same hand drifting to the small of my back as he ushers me through the door. Hell, I even miss a playful squeeze of my knee in the car as we drive to a party or to the grocery store.
Sunday, February 03, 2008
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Posts
7 people who bitched:
I like a good slap on the ass. Getting, not giving.
Well heck, giving too.
i know exactly how you feel. until i am REALLY comfortable with the person [have known them YEARS, slept with them, loaned them money] I DO NOT WANT THEM TOUCHING ME!!! i even have guys i've slept with, when the relationship is over, THEY BETTER NOT TOUCH ME. this guy patted my arm in synagogue the other night, i told him if he touched me again i was going to beat the crap out of him. not exactly beit hashaolom, but body space respect is too important. and BTW, tickling like that IS abuse.
carymc- Ooh, I forgot about that! Heh.
Unicorn- yeah, I struggle with the idea of forceful tickling as abuse...at one point you're laughing, then it's not funny anymore, and when that person does not stop, well, I don't know. I'm sure my dad and uncles had no malice in their hearts when they would do it, but I still hated it.
how about when your are spooning with a guy and you feel something poking against your back?
today is my birthday...yay for me!
Babealicious photo. And no, you don't need lipstick in it.
I come from a long line of huggers and kisser-on-the-cheekers as a general greeting. I'll make note next time I see you, Alie. :)
Bo- thanks!
Andrew- kisses are ok from you, as long as there's no tongue!
Post a Comment