So folks, after my wildly popular cat post (you should see my stats), thanks in part to MNSpeak, I've decided to go the way of most sequel movie directors and phone it in today. All hail the random list of thoughts...
I think the commercial for local restaraunt, Al Vento, is fucking hilarious. It's a short clip of the owner describing his menu as if you were dining at that moment. His seemingly meth-fueled screed is both disturbing and endearing.
I made a greek salad tonight for dinner and I had forgotten how much I like feta cheese.
That new movie, "Evening," looks like it's going to be the biggest pile of sappy tripe of the summer. Every time I see that commercial with Meryl Streep saying women are mysterious creatures (or some shit like that) in that phony "I'm a wise motherly figure" voice, I want nothing more than to carve out my uterus with a soup spoon. Barf.
I hate chick flicks. Can you tell?
Why do people have to be so mean to each other? Can't we just all get along and sing songs while holding hands in a circle and then braid each others' hair and talk about our dreams and menstrual cycles over a bottle of cheap chardonnay? There's too much hate in the world.
OK, even that made me gag a little.
I keep putting off making an appointment to get two teeth filled. You'd think after 4 tattoos, 12 piercings, and 2 major surgery's, getting 2 teeth drilled wouldn't be such a big deal. But, fuck, do I hate the dentist and the sound of that fucking drill and the smell of burning tooth. Makes my butthole pucker.
I am fucking sick of hearing about the iPhone. Mostly because I can't afford one...but, whatever.
Same goes for hearing about Paris Hilton. I made the mistake of leaving the sound on during "Entertainment Tonight" and I almost put out my cigarette in my own eye.
Jay Leno is not funny. He tells hack jokes with a shitty delivery. How is this guy still the host of the "Tonight Show?"
Does anyone else think Ann Coulter should just get it over with and make out with John Edwards? God, it's so obvious she's got a hard-on for him...literally...
Alright, that's all I got for Deep Thoughts...discuss...
Thursday, June 28, 2007
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12 people who bitched:
yeah the iphone is just a phone to me. I'd rather be 5 years behind the times in the cell phone category.
Ann Coulter should just shut up in general too.
I don't want an iPhone. There, I said it. Fuck the iPhone! I'm not paying $600 and get forced to switch carriers, then pay another $60 per month on top of my voice plan for a data plan. We'll see how I feel when the second generation comes out (maybe Christmas?).
Fucking Ann Coulter. I'd say she's just a shrill neocon version of Howard Stern, but that wouldn't be fair to Stern. He's much more honest than she is.
i actually think jay leno's monolage is pretty funny. however, i prefer letterman over leno. i think its because i'm from NY.
farts and fluff forever!
"carve out my uterous with a soup spoon." HAHA! I agree.
PS-thanks for defending me on MNspeak. There was never a truer discription of me but "nuts in a good way." ;-)
The tooth drilling is different though because it's in your head. You can't get away from the noise. It's not even a matter of pain for me, it's just that fucking noise.
Leno's monologue doesn't do much for me either. I do love watching him do the headlines and ads from newspapers and magazines. I usually get a couple good chortles out of that bit.
Makes my butthole pucker
Oh yeah.
Several lines cracke me up - all the self inflicting ones, but the soup spoon one is one I may just have to use.
IMO, Leno's jokes are lame, but what I really CAN'T STAND is that smug little smile he always has on his fat face during his monologue, like, "Yeeeeaah, I already used that joke a dozen times but I'm too rich to care."
It's hard to decide which I love more - Ann Coulter or feta cheese. I guess I'd just rather eat feta cheese off Ann Coulter's tummy.
Yup. That's what I'd rather do.
menstrual cycles being talked about is sort of a given if there are more than 2 women in a room together especially when wine is involved.
as for all that kumbaya bullshit, i agree, chick flicks suck dirty, sweaty donkey balls. meryl streep makes me sleepy. it's like i can't help but want to sleep the second she's on camera. zzzzz...
12 piercings?!? where?!
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